My present struggle is the disparity between reality and expectation. The expectation was unprecedented success doing something I care about. The reality is a full time job in retail. Reality is kicking my ass.

But I’ll gladly work a low-income job if it lets me pursue a no-income passion.

I’m doing standup comedy in New York. Most nights of the week, I’m on a stage in front of strangers trying to make them laugh. I’ve convinced myself that my ideas are so funny that I need to share them with people who have had anywhere from zero to I-lost-count drinks on a Monday night before they go back to their jobs on Tuesday morning, moving furniture or teaching math class.

When it goes well, you’ve never felt better. When it goes poorly, you want to die twice. I’ve known both of these. Well…mostly the second one.

September 6, 2010. Leave a comment or view the discussion here.

I turned 24 years old two and a half weeks ago. Since then, I have met a businessman from Spain who designs modular compost boxes, bombed at an open mic comedy night, eaten at a restaurant owned by Justin Timberlake, infringed upon a married woman’s personal space, hopped in a hot tub at 2 AM after a 45-minute cab ride, agonized over how to find the right girl, been sexually propositioned the wrong girl, and sung songs from Jesus Christ Superstar at a karaoke bar. Presently I’m holed up in a coffee shop, severely distracted by the young dreadlocked hippie mom breastfeeding her baby in the corner.

These things happened in New York City. I hesitate to call it home, but it’s certainly where I live.

My apartment is a tiny thing above Central Park in a neighborhood that’s far more strange than it is dangerous. You can buy pantyhose at the liquor store here. Yesterday I saw a guy shaving his head in the subway stop. And earlier this week I walked out my front door headed to work and was greeted by the sight of an old man facing me, dick in his hands, peeing on the sidewalk at 8 AM.

If this kind of thing is going to keep happening, I need to move before someone splashes on me.

September 5, 2010. Leave a comment or view the discussion here.

Is it just me, or does “Googling yourself” sound dirty?

September 4, 2010. Leave a comment or view the discussion here.