I’m a failed romantic and idiot sentimentalist who built himself out of bicycle parts and kittens. I enjoy long walks off short piers and long peers in strangers’ windows. I know all that glitters is glitter.

I’m irresponsible and irresistible to the tenth power. I’m one wascally wabbit and a hell of a space cadet. “That boy saved my life several times,” is a quote that may be about me, spoken by somebody who may or may not be famous.

My mom taught me manners. My dad taught me math. Sense and Sensibility failed to teach me sense and sensibility.

People always ask me, “Dylan, why do you want to be a cowboy? You’re from Northern Virginia.” To which I reply, “Yeah…Western Northern Virginia.”