Dylan Love: editorial gun for hire.

Gwyneth Paltrow is my spiritual leader

Like most of youngish America, I joined the seemingly arbitrary Paltrow Pile-On that was all-too-readily hastened by endless internet connectivity. I tweeted a few snarky criticisms and felt nothing. As far as I was concerned, Gwyneth, her husband Chris, and even little baby Apple, they were rich celebrities who could take it.

To this day, mother, entrepreneur, and award-winning actress Gwyneth Paltrow is poopooed by social media satirists who each fancy themselves the next edgy guy with a book deal that proudly outlines his negative outlook. I know them well because I used to be one.

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Then I caught an interview with her where she is asked the question (and I’m paraphrasing) “Why does everyone hate you so much?”, to which our Margo Tenenbaum replies (and I’m paraphrasing) “People need to ask themselves ‘What it is about this image that inspires such a negative reaction in me?'” That’s some real talk that can (and should!) be applied much more often in our daily lives.

I, for example, have generalized beef with New York. I think about moneyed debutantes living inside a multi-story single family home embedded in a skyscraper. Then I think about the folks sleeping in the park at night (it’s only camping when you do it by choice). You’ve got those with disposable income on one hand, and those society has deemed “disposable” on the other.

Then I think about me, not fitting into either category at all. There’s no way my place is as warm as a well-wintered brownstone on the Upper West Side, but I’ve also accidentally dropped a dime on the sidewalk and decided it was worth ten cents not to pick it back up. This disparity is the image in my mind as I run my weird, anxious marathon.

Were it not for the female lead of Shakespeare in Love saying effectively those words in effectively that order — “What it is about this image that inspires such a negative reaction in me?” — I might never have had cause to put such a thought into words. Hence my case for Gwyneth Paltrow as spiritual leader.

Don’t listen to anything else she says, though. She’s terrible.